Thursday, March 29, 2012

Daycare conundrum

Just when I think we’ve got the daycare situation back under control, another curve ball comes my way. Due to circumstances beyond my control, I am once again responsible for transporting both boys to and from daycare. Yes, it sucks. Yes, it blows. Yes, it pisses me off a lot little. But there’s nothing that can be done about me being the lone driver.

Adding the second kid back into my routine requires at least an extra 15 minutes for waking/dressing/attending to in the morning. It adds an extra 30 minutes to each end of my commute. It requires the little one to spend an extra 40-50 minutes a day in the car, and the big one to spend an extra hour or so at daycare every day. It also leaves me with the twice-a-day dilemma of choosing a screaming, freaked out, almost-two-year-old left in the car (judge away; I’ve made my peace with it) while I run the older one into/drag him out of his daycare center, or herding two kids into/out of the center and then getting the screaming, kicking, pissed off, almost-two-year-old back into the car so we can continue on.

I’m sure anyone reading is thinking, “Hey, dumbass. The solution here is simple. Put them back in the same daycare. Boom. Problem solved.” But it’s not quite that easy. Part of the appeal of putting the boys in separate locations was giving R some time away from W. R was starting to pick up some of W’s less-desirable habits, which has pretty much disappeared since W went to a different center. The main reason, though, is that I LOVE the place R is. Love it. It’s an in-home center, which I now know I vastly prefer to a traditional commercial daycare center environment. The woman who owns the place is just fantastic. The boys both love her and the other women who work there. I know all of the women at R’s center well, and feel like I hardly know anything about the people working at W’s center. Plus, both boys have friends at the old center.

Quick story. At the end of last week, I had pretty much made up my mind to move R. Then, I take him in one day, and his best bud, a little girl who’s about six months younger than he, walks over yelling his name. R took off toward her and flung his arms around her neck for a big hug. It was the cutest damn thing. Seriously. It made my heart break a little thinking about taking him away from his friends. And all the older kids still ask almost every day where W is. It’s been almost two months since he left, and they still miss him and want to play with him. W never talks about kids at the new place the way he did about kids at R’s place, either. I don’t know if that’s because he doesn’t have any good friends yet, or what, but it sort of bugs me. I know they’re both young and won’t remember one way or the other who they played with at two and three, but I’m ridiculous and it bugs me anyway.

There’s also – as always – the financial component. I actually think moving R would bring our monthly daycare total back down to where is was when they were both at the same place, depending on the second child discount the new place gives. If there’s no discount, though, we’d be adding to our expenses, which we can’t really do.

I’m pretty much on my own making this decision. I hate being tasked with this. I don’t do well making big decisions, as I almost always end up regretting my choice. Plus I can’t help but think that I’m going to be ruining my kid’s social development and life in general to save myself an hour or so of driving a day. I know this is what’s going to end up happening – how can it not? But I’m excessively fretting about it anyway.

1 comment:

Doing My Best said...

Ugh! This does not sound like a fun decision to make =(!! Good luck!