Pregnancy triggers

No matter what they tell you in health class, there's more to getting pregnant than just having sex. Read on.

Originally written September 10.

My mom has this theory that every woman only has one fertile time a year. For example, my brother, sister, and I all have birthdays within five weeks of each other. Her fertile time was mid-March. My coworker's two children are about two weeks apart. Her fertile time was in November. A friend has three children whose birthdays are all within a month or so of each other. Her fertile time was August.

My mom might have a point.

Regardless, I don't fit into her theory.

Rather than being fertile once a year, I'm fertile when the stars align just right, and the following things happen:

1. I'm getting ready to start my third cycle after not having a period for some substantial length of time, and


2. One of my law school friends is approximately two months pregnant.

That's how it's happened both times. I've told my law school friends that they MUST tell me the second they know they're pregnant so I can make B stay the hell away from me during the dangerous time. I think they just laughed at me.

At least I figured out the pattern so I know what to look for to prevent this from happening again.*

*It will also be prevented from happening again because B is getting a vasectomy. Whether he wants one or not.