I started reading Baby Bargains (I really need to learn how to do links...) last night. This book is guaranteed to save you money when shopping for your brand new baby's crap. If it actually does this, it will definitely be worth its $14 purchase price.
After getting through Chapter 1, which details exactly how much an average baby costs through its first year of life, I'm a bit panicked. For example, did you know the average woman spends $1,260 on maternity clothes? 1,260 dollars! That's freaking ridiculous. I'm pissed that I've had to spend approximately $200 so far, and I refuse, REFUSE to buy any more (except some work pants and something to wear to my showers...I can't get around buying those, no matter how much I want to). The other first year necessities (not including food, insurance, medical expenses, day care, and the like, so purely stuff) average around $6,000. Obviously, if that's the average, you can do it cheaper, but even cheaper is probably several thousand dollars. That seems like an awful lot of money for such a little person. And on top of that, you have to feed it, and take it to the doctor, and buy it Christmas presents (would we be terrible parents if we didn't buy our six or so week old baby Christmas presents this year?), and pay for daycare, and the list goes on and on.
So, this got me thinking. I need to come up with a way to scam people into buying baby stuff for me. I'm talking something beyond baby showers. Something big. Do you think I could do some kind of "Support My Baby" telethon? Maybe the yam guy on TV would do a commerical asking people to take pity on me and my poor baby and sponsor it for just $18 a month. If I get enough sponsors, the baby will pay for itself! This could work, right? Right?